A Note From Mom

Hi to everyone who has been in touch or trying to get in touch with Douglas.

I know that many of you have lost touch with him-not only due to his living arrangements of late but in fact we lost him long before that in many ways due to his addiction... He's Back! That's right-we have our big hearted, spirited, interested, and interesting Douglas back. He is doing sooo good. He has handled this situation, as you would expect him to. The same way he handled other issues in his life, with humility, humor, positive-focused determination as well as through helping others. Speaking out loud with his head held high. Telling it his way and being able to make those hearing his word to understand that if it happened to someone like him-it can happen to anyone of us. The key to not falling victim is to be aware that it claims and destroys without discrimination. It can sneak up on you over time or it can claim you the first opportunity it has. It will affect not only your life, but everyone who you love, or is near you. It will affect those who you've never yet, not yet. (as the Black Crows song goes) You will find yourself when the pain is so overwhelming that the only answer, at the time, is to stop that pain, at any expense. Douglas knew this first hand. Is without sugar-coating, excuses, blame, or for those who know. sorry- Doug's history.. . His dad Danny Darby knew al this too. Yet Danny thought he had his demon's behind him. That he knew what to watch for the signs, that he was stronger then drug. He wasn't...Douglas, as well as I, his brothers and sister, grandparents, and you-his many, many friends who know what this young man is made of-IS! He is focused. He is positive. He is surrounding himself with support and determined people. He is speaking out. Head held high. No sugar-coating, no excuses, no blame to others. No judgment. He is telling his story-his way, through helping others. Even to those who have never had to deal with this issue. Drugs, lifestyle, incarceration, manipulative people, control, bad situations, being true to yourself, admitting that you have a problem, finding or asking for help without judgment. The system is behind him as well. Through Doug's actions the State of WI had the control- they too saw what we all know. Doug stood up and told his story. His story alone. He blamed no one. He made no excuses. He expected no special treatment. His remorse for those he hurt came through with honesty, humility, regret and shame. He told the judge he will take responsibility for those actions. He will prove himself and do the work that needs to be done. He will do it for the rest of his life. Every day that he wakes up-is a day that he was never expecting to see again. .that's how close he was to letting his addiction win. The way that addiction took the life of his wonderful father, Danny after being clean for 10 years! Doug was very lucky that the judge the prosecution atty and the people in charge @Oshkosh Correctional saw that this is 1 lucky kid. This is 1special kind of person. He will do more help to others outside then he could do behind walls. He will turn this into helping others from ever going down the path of destruction or thinking that it couldn't happen to you or your loved ones. And that if you have, to find the strength to put your foot in another direction. There is hope as long as you’re willing to see it for what it is and doing what needs to be done. sorry-this message has been so long and sad. But so has the last few years in dealing with this issue. Doug will be out in the next 6-8months. He is wonderful. He looks like he's in his teens. His eyes are sparkling with good humor. He is interesting and interested. His heart is light. He's Back! He's nobody’s fool. And he's happy to wake up every morning. He is loved…

Thanks for your time…

Always remember.

Doug’s mom, Tami